Pain is real, but so is Hope

May is National mental health awareness month and for me it’s also a special month. Not because we celebrate Mother’s Day, but because it’s the birth month of my first born son. He’s no longer here with me physically but I carry him deeply in my heart-daily. As a parent/mother, I never thought I would bury my child. Like many parents, I thought my child would bury me. Notably, there have been some emotional and mental setbacks with just trying to make it all make sense. Questioning God, why? Only to Him clearly say, “why not!” I can now admit that I have had some Dark days, sleepless and restless nights. I’m learning more each day that I’m not in pain. Many times when we lose someone close to us, the Pain makes us often feel as if we’re suffocating. Deep-rooted emotional pain hurts. Many times we think/feel that no one understands or hears us when we try to explain. We become numb, shut down, and we often walk out on those who really just want to save us. Yes, save us from the paralyzation that pain can cause; leaving us standing still and stuck in time. I know that feeling all too well. I also know that where there is Pain, there is also Hope! Regardless of our past, our story matters. Good and bad, our Experiences equip us for our God given purpose. Every day will not be a good day, but every day will not be a bad day either.